The Hedonist
Lover of luxury, indulgence and excess the Hedonist is an archetype of decadence and sensuality. The Hedonist is a physical archetype, strongly connected to the body and to the physical world around him or her. Self-indulgent and self-gratification are the hallmarks of this archetype. The Hedonist is often considered lazy, self-centered and avoidant. The Hedonist wants to experience only pleasure and usually immediate pleasure and desires to avoid all pain and suffering. Their pursuit of this, leads to a life of gluttony, excess, and in many cases, addiction. The Hedonist is prone to addictions of all kinds. Drugs and alcohol, tobacco and marijuana, obsession with food, in addition to other kinds of addictions like shopping, especially online shopping because it can be done from the comfort of a pair of pajamas. TV, computer and video games, reading books, especially light novels that don’t require much analysis or thought. The Hedonist doesn’t like work and anything that delays gratification is avoided, and they have an “eat dessert first” attitude toward most things in life. The problems the Hedonist deals with are issues of unreliability, instability, lacking motivation and drive, procrastination, and lack of purpose. The Hedonist can be flaky and unreliable. They like long showers, pampering themselves with face masks and body lotions, soft slippers and silk bed sheets. Comfort is high on the priority list. They enjoy fine dining, beautiful clothes, sexy lingerie, and conversely, they also enjoy lying in bed until noon, wearing baggy clothes and worn out sweats and forgetting to shower for three days in a row. For the Hedonist, it’s all about the body: what the body wants, how it wants it, when it wants it and with whom. They are driven by their desire in the moment, how they feel, their mood and emotional state determine their actions. Guilt is not a motivating force for the Hedonist, and they aren’t regulated by social pressure. This can often lead to a casual rudeness or disregard for others.
Some key words associated with the Hedonist:
- Indulgence
- Gratification
- Pleasure-Seeking
- Avoidance
- Addiction
- Unreliable
- Lazy
- Unmotivated
- Gluttonous
- Frivolous
Examples include Dorian Gray in Oscar Wilde’s A Picture of Dorian Gray
The Bon Vivant
The Hedonist has a light side, the Bon Vivant. This French borrowed phrase means “living the good life,” or “good living.” The Bon Vivant is the positive expression of the Hedonist and while they share their love of pleasure, the Bon Vivant understands that pain is part of pleasure. They don’t avoid the difficulties of life but rather embrace them with a joy and an acceptance that can appear remarkable to others. They have a knack for putting the pleasure into work and other necessary tasks. They enjoy the physical body too, but moderation provides the balance for deeper enjoyment. The Bon Vivant knows that contrast is the great enhancer. The seek hard work to enjoy their downtime more fully. Beauty is a big part of the Bon Vivant’s life and they beautify their surroundings with soothing art, comfortable furniture and well-lit environments. Their ability to take pleasure in the small things is a great asset and others feel permission to enjoy life when they are with the Bon Vivant. They are generous and open-hearted and find great joy in nature. Anything that feeds the senses is added to improve their lives and moment by moment experiences. Atmosphere is particularly important to the Bon Vivant, such as lighting, fragrances, and good food. The Bon Vivant is often a chef, interior or fashion designer, connoisseur of good wines, cheeses and other specialty foods. They are keen observers of the physical world and love the feel of things, sand underfoot, the feel of tree trunk, the breeze on the skin, the texture of mud. One of the great gifts of the Bon Vivant is their ability to access the present moment. The body lives in the Now. It cannot live in the past, nor the future but is bound to the present. The Bon Vivant, so connected to the body, can easily step into the present moment. There they find the mysteries of being, and the joy of the Now. Spiritual ecstasy and attainment of equilibrium is part of the life learning for the Bon Vivant. There are actual hedonistic philosophies that promote pleasure as a life practice. Epicurus is probably the most famous example of this but instead of living an opulent and life of excess he practiced something closer to minimalist living. Enhancing pleasure with balance and even restraint to refine the senses for deeper appreciation of life is part of this archetypal lesson. It amplifies all that is truly valuable. Worry and stress are viewed as unnecessary and rarely indulged. Peace of mind and heart accessed through the simple pleasures of existing are foundational for the Bon Vivant
- Sensuality
- Beauty
- Nature
- The Present Moment
- Joy
- Appreciation
- Generosity
- Simplicity
- Pleasure
- Balance
